Comments on: Musician hits sour note

By: Karleen

Karleen — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 01:23:42 +0000

Okay – It has taken me far too long to post this, hope it’s not old news. Dating Goddess, as you know I was married to a musician and have had a 25+ year relationship with a person in the music industry so…..take my insights for what you will. The musician I was married to was a DETAIL person to the very end (read – trimed the grass with scissors, swept and mopped the garage weekly, etc) so he had every detail in his brain. There was not very much that slipped by or eluded him and I know he would have not gotten the distance or dates mixed up if he wanted something to work out. Now, the OTHER man in my life is scattered beyond compare. He will say, ” I will call you later” and never do it, keep me hanging when he is in town to know when I can see him, etc. All this being said, I think the PERSON is who he his and occupation is incidental. My two cents on the subject.

By: Ronnie Ann Ryan - The Dating Coach

Ronnie Ann Ryan - The Dating Coach — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 12:40:28 +0000

Dear Dating Goddess,
So sorry tto hear of this sour note. That stinks! I’m sure you thought it would just be a kick to meet the guy. But I do agree with Mark and a few others. While it seems like light-hearted fun to flirt with someone long distance or over time, when it comes to meeting, it can be a big disappointment. Sadly, the fantasty and flirting are often better than the real thing.

People sometimes start to think they “know” the person with so much time passing. And while it may seem fair to expect basic courtesy from the guy, he didn’t see it that way. It’s impossible to understand what motivates people to do the things they do and how they manage to justify their actions.

There’s an old joke Jay Leno told about a man and a woman early in a relationship driving in a car. She brings up something about their relationship, he answers vaguely. She decides to drop it and when she’s back at home, calls a girlfriend to figure things out. They disucss this on and off for over a year.

On the other hand, the guy enters his home, flicks on the TV, takes out a bag of Doritos and enjoys. Momentarily his minds goes to the converstsaion, but then he quickly returns to the show, laughs at Jay, then pops another Dorito.

Morale of the story – eat the Doritos – it’s far more satisfying than trying to figure out what he was thinking or why he did what he did.

Or what I say to my dating coaching clients is, “Who’s next?” Thankfully, it’s an abundant world filled with new men to meet.

By: angie

angie — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 12:19:27 +0000

I think the entertainer was merely entertaining.If he reakky wanted to hook up with the young lady he would of had all of his plans together. There was no mistake ,this guy knew exactly what he was doing play by play. Flirting is good on the phone ,texting but however once a man takes it to the next level of a face to face hook up but when you get all of these excuses why it didn’t happen,something else is going on. Don’t harden your heart it is what it was .This guy was shooting to he a bunch of nonesense

By: Samantha

Samantha — Sat, 18 Jul 2009 20:30:19 +0000

But how in to a woman can a guy be when all they’ve done is flirt by phone/email without ever meeting! He was probably doing this because he really doesn’t want to put in the effort to have a real relationship. It always becomes apparant when the time comes for the rubber to hit the pavement. It falls apart quickly and truth is revealed.. I dont think it’s about men being flaky, I think it’s about learning to read the signs and then avoiding people who dont want a relationship.

By: Meari

Meari — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 17:18:47 +0000

Men of all ages are flaky. I’ve seen it before, too. Comes as no surprise.