As a kid, were you ever disappointed when Santa didn’t deliver a coveted gift? I was. I would pout and sometimes even cry from disappointment, not being interested in the socks and clothing gifts that were utilitarian but not something I’d yearned for. I know I should have been grateful to have anything, but a kid’s mind doesn’t always work that way. Especially when my siblings seemed to get their highly desired gifts. They were pleased with Santa’s largesse.
Fast forward to adulthood. When we find a sweetheart at the holidays, we may attribute the treasure to Santa, or more likely, to a higher power. But what if you don’t get the gift of a sweetie yet your single friends do?
It’s hard to not feel left out and disappointed.
In the last 6 weeks, two of my dear, single pals have found matches — people who share a mutual admiration. Both couples seem smitten and are enjoying the throes of fresh love. I eagerly question my pals about their sweeties and am sincerely glad they have found someone great.
Meanwhile, I look at my empty Christmas stocking and wonder how — and why — Santa has forsaken me.
Yet, I have been with sweeties during holidays past. Most were strange misfits for me. Like the one who bought me a set of “proper” red wine glasses since he didn’t like the ones I had, even though I don’t drink red wine. Or the guy who bought me a new cell phone with a walkie-talkie feature so he could talk to me any time — even though I already had a cell phone I liked and this would cost me $100/month. Or the one who invited himself to my family celebration, then heaped mashed potatoes on his plate so high they fell onto the tablecloth.
So sometimes, I’ve learned, it’s better to be sweetieless for the holidays than to be with someone who makes the season worse, not better.
But it is nice when you have someone with whom to take in the holiday light displays, attend choral performances, and enjoy seasonal events. So now I’ve learned to do these activities by myself or with friends rather than miss out.
Perhaps Santa is just a little late with his present. Maybe my gift guy will appear on Epiphany. Stay tuned!